Last year I got Leonie Dawson's life planner for the first time. The 2014 Create Your Amazing Life Workbook guided me to dream, plan and implement some of the changes I wished in my life.

Even though I often felt frustrated and hopeless this year, I know that the only way to go is forward. I reviewed my workbook and stuck to my plans as best as I could, trying hard not to get side-tracked or pushed in the wrong direction.

My main goals were:


- Get my residence permit and rent an apartment with my boyfriend. Check, check!
- Find a job. Found a temporary part-time, plus volunteering at an international school. Income is not much but it's a good experience.
- Self-publish my first book. Haven't finished writing it yet, but progressed a lot!
- Visit my family in Brazil. Tickets booked for next year, yes!
- Lose 10kg. Actually lost 15!
- Speak Dutch. I’m almost there!


My word for 2014 was FLOW and I definitely felt it. My residence paperwork is finally in order, we moved and made new friends, I’ve been working and networking, I’m done with Social Orientation and Dutch lessons and I finally released the weight I’ve gained in the last four years!

I had no idea how to accomplish some of those things when I wrote them down, but somehow I did - by revising them every month, brainstorming and tweaking where necessary. I’m sure that if I didn’t have that tool, I would have procrastinated or even given up.

I am very grateful for all that I learned this year, but now it’s time to let it go and look forward.

We must always hope that the future will be brighter, or what do we get out of bed for?

I sat alone with a cup of tea, a blanket and my 2015 Create Your Shining Year. I started reflecting about this year but ended up thinking and scribbling about my whole life – everything that brought me to where and who I am today.

What came out of that was the realization that the dance between the Universe and me has been working well so far, that it’s time to stop worrying so much.

I’ve been playing with a word for 2015: SUCCESS. I do not have many goals, but I do know how I want to feel: focused and satisfied. I will focus on writing and teaching, which are the things I can do well and that bring me a sense of accomplishment.

I will figure out the details of self-publishing and keep on writing and becoming a better writer.

I will figure out how to be self-employed in Belgium and I will start to create income.

Other than that I have long lists of movies to watch, books to read and places to visit, which are the things that makes me the happiest. That should be simple enough.

How about you? What are you celebrating this year? 
What goals have you set for next year?

 

I spend a lot of my time longing for the things I don’t have yet, daydreaming the ideal scenarios of my future. It’s inspiring and uplifting at times and I tell myself “Nothing is impossible” and “Who says I can’t have it all?”

Some other times all this wanting just hurts. I realize how far I am from that ideal life and I am not able to see how on earth I’ll get there. I’m powerless, hopeless and a little bit apathetic.

But why do I want the things I want? What if I didn’t want them? Would I be less frustrated and more passionate about my life right now?

Let’s start with me wanting a house with a big garden to raise chicken in. We just moved, forgodssakes! And here I am, stressing about how much money we would need for a house and should we buy or should we build?

Next on that train of thought, I decide that it’s definitely time for us to have a baby. And that the use of my family name is non-negotiable. We live in a one-bedroom apartment and I don’t have sufficient/stable income, isn’t it the perfect time to get pregnant?

I imagine us in this beautiful home, watching the children play, eating our home-grown vegetables and I get lost and anxious in the when, where and how of things. I’m such a big failure at 28 years of age.

Really, people, the things that go on in my head are ridiculous.

Then, I decide that we absolutely need to travel the world. Backpack, work on a cruise ship, become flight attendants for Emirates, WWOOF, Workaway, whatever takes us on incredible adventures far away.

I also want to have my own business, work from home, create passive income, profit from my passions. But as hard as I try, I can’t figure that out. I have written half a book in about eleven months and I still don’t know when or how to publish it.

Money, house, children, travel… Have you ever paused to question the reason you want things?

I did. And the answer is either because I truly do or because I see other people doing it.

I had to question my wishes when they started making me so anxious I couldn't appreciate what was right under my nose: a wonderful boyfriend and a lovely apartment. Family and friends’ support all around us. Health. Fun. Beauty. Opportunities.

I have been forcing myself to limit social media time. The less I see of other people’s cute babies, exotic travels, weight loss, weddings or business, the closer I get to what I truly desire (and what I don’t) and the more I focus on loving my life right now.

I do love to see that my friends are leading happy lives, but the speed and the sheer amount of information is flipping my brain!

What if we try a different way? Simpler, easier, lighter? 

Share your thoughts below!

Do what is doable. Start now.

That is one of my favourite lessons from Leonie Dawson’s Business Goddess Course, which I did for the first time a year ago.

Last year I was a confused, insecure, freaked-out mess. I’m still not over it, but I can certainly say that I’m on the right path. When I couldn’t find a job in Belgium and felt like I had a whole lot to learn about myself and “what to do with my life”, I decided to take the leap and sign up for the Amazing Biz and Life Academy. God, I love that name! Because that’s what I dreamed of: having an amazing career and an amazing life. I wanted to create my own income somehow, doing work that I love and doing whatever the hell I wanted with my time!

Leonie teaches women all over the world how to start and grow online businesses and she does that by sharing exactly how she did it herself. How she went from blogging and selling prints of her art to a million dollar a year company that keeps on growing.

The ABLA is overflowing with e-courses, workbooks, videos, meditations and, best of all, a forum where we can ask and share anything and where people are honest and serious about sharing their talents and creating the life + work they dream of. They are artists, teachers, writers, coaches - creative and spiritual women.

Since I joined I learned so much about blogging, websites, mailing lists, creating, marketing and selling online products (books and courses), connecting with like-minded people, different ways to make money online and so much more.

However, the best thing I learned was how to get out of that paralyzing freaked-out state I was in. Leonie’s resources, other members’ blogs and forum discussions eventually brought me more clarity about what I want to do. It was a twisty road that included the creation of this website (with my own domain name!), e-books, a LOT of guest blogging, reading and networking, ideas that never left my head, doubting and crying and being broke. Damn, I’m still broke! But things are coming together and looking up. I KNOW now what I didn’t know then: I am a writer. I am going to write all my life and I’ll get better and better at it. I’ll publish this book I’ve been working on, one way or the other. And I’ll write another one. And another one. Money will follow.

Leonie's newest program, Double Your Biz Intensive, is out today! It is so complete and full of advice and I've already started taking notes and thinking about what I can improve about my blogging and online presence. And as she says, theory is not going to grow your business; implementing what you learn will. 

So if you own a business (online or "in real life") or have always dreamed about starting one; If you would like to learn how to make money online or profit from your passions, check her out: Biz and Blog Star Workshop - blog - videos - freebies. 

Today my lovely guest is Steffie Vandierendonck. We met through the Amazing Biz and Life Academy and she came all the way to Ghent to eat pancakes with me and chat about finding our purpose, doing work we love and making a difference. She recently gave me great advice about making decisions and being more intuitive, since I've been struggling with choosing a career path here in Belgium. Here's a bit of her wisdom: 

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Can you make a decision based on faith? Can you listen to your intuition and be ok?

Last year I went looking for a coaching program to invest in and always seem to have some part holding me back.

It was a money issue of course but there was also more to it. At some point I really started believing that money shouldn't stop us. We take a leap of faith, invest what we have, see two steps ahead of us an trust that the rest will come to us when we need it.

So why isn't that enough?

When I investigated what was still holding me back I came up with the answer that it was TIME. I felt I wouldn't have the time to implement all of the things I was about to learn.  And I know some coaches would call this a lame excuse or some subconscious block that is in desperate need of healing. But what if it is something else? What if it is our intuition reaching out?

I know that this feeling came from an inner knowing of already having a lot of resources at my disposal and needed to implement those first before moving on to another level.

It was knowing that I didn't have to go look outside of myself but rather turn inside and retrace steps to see what I had missed.

Don't be fooled by the heart!

These days we talk a lot about getting out of our head and deciding with our heart. But there is a catch to this we all seem to forget.

It is true that our head is the place of logic and reason. It is our reptilian brain of instinct and survival. And we go and question everything as a way to protect ourselves. Through evolution we have learned that this can take us too far and the fears are no longer rational.

However in turning to our heart we let our emotions take over. It is like jumping from one pool into another one. Yes our heart is the place of love and positive feelings. It will tell us what we want, what we long for and what we dream of. And those words describe the energy that goes with it.

What feels good isn't always in our best interest. It can be the energy of a child wanting a toy and wanting it right there and then. If you long for something you can become needy or depend on it. It will make you feel lost, even more than before, when that certain things goes. That is why we say our heart aches when we lose someone.

That's why we should stop listening just to our hearts and go even deeper to our gut feelings.

Feeling with your gut, those energy centers around your belly button and womb, that's where your true intuition is situated. It is a place of peace, being grounded and having a deep calm inner knowing. Here you will be able to make serene choices and take guided action.

In this place you will know that the path ahead of you can be tough and scary (mind) but no matter if it feels positive or negative right now (heart) it will end up being exactly what you needed to grow as a person. Here money won't be an issue anymore and time won't matter either because everything will come to you when you need it.

If it feels wrong following another program right now due to timing, this opportunity will come back to you when you need it and there will still be diamonds of insight to be found in what you already know. If you do decide to take a next step you will pick up the things you need to hear from that right there and then. The rest will sink into your subconscious waiting until you are ready for it.

So what choice should you make?

I have found the hardest choices are the ones you don't get answers to.

Sometimes no matter how far you look, how many tarot cards you read or how much you meditate on it your intuition and gut feeling won't speak to you. They will remain silent and truly leave you on your own. Those choices are the ones where it truly DOES NOT MATTER WHAT YOU DECIDE.

All of the options can be right for you. They will just be showing different aspects of yourself that are waiting to be cultivated. They will both take you somewhere else but you will still be you when you get there and you will still be ok. The only mistake you can make here is not choosing anything at all.

Just do something... Pick... and try it out for a month. If it doesn't end up to be for you you will still be able to change your mind and choose again.

I will admit this was a very hard lesson for me to learn.

But then I remembered what Rozlyn Warren said to me: ' I can do all of those things myself, but I choose not to.'

It is better to pick one thing and become really good at it then to keep doubting and see other people living your dreams.

If there is a price you'll have to pay than pay it both literary an figuratively speaking.

And for those things you don't end up doing there will always be someone else doing it for you. Some coach, healer or employee at your local store will reach those people for you making the world a better place for all of us.

Ten years ago (!) I sat in one of the crossroads of my life. I was seventeen and had just finished high school and taken my entrance exams for University. I knew then, as I know now, that choosing a career is not something fair to ask of a teenager.

Our schools taught us one thing: what would be on the entrance exams. “Pay attention now, this is probably going to be on the exam”. And so we went throughout high school: learning how to pass the feared vestibular, solving hundreds of questions a week, taking extra classes and practice exams.

People broke up relationships and gave up their social lives in order to study because “while you’re having fun your opponent is studying” or “that is the difference between those who pass and those who don’t”.  

For a while my biggest fear was not passing the damn thing. Not that I was a bad student, mind you. I was a perfectly trained exam-acing machine. I didn’t mind studying and I liked writing essays, so I was ok. But I regretted what I was forced to learn – I hated math and chemistry with a passion. I didn’t see the use of memorizing so much information only to regurgitate it back during exams. It didn’t make my life any better, it didn’t make me a more skillful and resourceful person. To be honest, after exams I used to forget most of what I had just done. Nowadays I can barely recall what I studied then.  

I wanted to learn how to be a decent adult, how to manage living on my own, first aid, self-defense, cooking, fixing stuff around the house and more creative things.

I have so much going on in my mind now that I started writing about the education system in Brazil that I think I will just drop it and go back to where I started.

When I was seventeen I didn’t have the faintest idea of what I wanted to do with my life. God, I still don’t. I went through our University brochure picking out what I definitely didn’t want to do – medicine, law, IT, etc. I eventually settled for English and my teachers thought it was a waste of good grades.

I passed on the first place.

I couldn’t have done much being educated in a town where traditional careers like law and medicine are still regarded as the best one can follow. I wasn’t taught to be creative and daring. I was taught to get into University, get a job and settle.

And that is what I did. In part, anyway. In four years I graduated as a teacher and had already been working for two years. I was restless. I didn’t want to do that. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed teaching and I was quite good at it, but I couldn’t allow myself to get comfortable.

I knew there was more to life, so I set out to explore it.

Ten years after that first crossroads in my life I have the same familiar feeling of uncertainty and curiosity. I am still not sure about my career choice and that can be frustrating at times but I get to learn new things and choose new paths.  

We all do. Always. 

New Year resolutions for me have never been more than wishes. In that magical moment at midnight, I’d close my eyes and think about the things I wish would happen. Needless to say, they didn’t happen or I simply forgot about them with the passing of time.

Then, I started having these big, yearly goals - living in the USA, living in Europe, coming back to Belgium – and give them all my attention and energy, not really worrying about what else would happen. They were a fun couple of years, focusing on the big decisions and letting the rest surprise me.

But now I feel like taking more action and responsibility in creating my own life. I know I can’t control every single thing and it’s not about that. It’s about starting a new year – and a new cycle of life, in my case – with a clear vision of how you want your life to unfold and what concrete actions you can take in order to achieve that.

The Create Your Amazing Life Workbook, by Leonie Dawson is making me think in detail and putting me in the best mindset for making things happen.

It starts by Celebrating and Releasing the past year. Maybe you just want to forget things that happened this year; or maybe you’re clinging to good and fun things that won’t come back. Either way, give thanks and let go. I wrote about the lessons I learned this year, the ways I was transformed, what dreams came true and why I’m happy today. I made a big gratitude list and let go.

I opened space for the new wonderful things to come. 

This workbook is not only about making plans. It’s about the BIG picture of YOUR LIFE.

How do you want to feel during the year? What will you give yourself this year? When everything sucks, what will you turn to? (It’s very handy to have this list around. I wrote down everything that makes me feel better, because when you’re sad it’s easy to sink even more.)

Leonie also prompts us to make lists of good habits, mottos and affirmations to hang/paste around the house. She encourages us to dream big and to dare writing our wildest goals down. Then, she shows us how to break it down in smaller steps.

I had never thought about planning my year like this. Sure, I’ve promised myself to eat healthier and exercise more, but it’s so easy to forget and slip into old habits and routines.

I’ve completed my workbook and I’ll review it every month to keep me on track of my gorgeous plans and challenges (Publish a book! Lose weight! Go to Brazil!). I’m sure the reminders, calendars and posters will help. 

What are your big dreams for next year?

If you are anything like me, you are restless and love to question.

You question and reflect on why people do what they do and why society expect us to live a certain way.

You are unsure about your work life and think that there must be a better way of doing it than dragging your exhausted self out of bed every morning to go to a job that doesn’t inspire you.

You don’t want to work exclusively for paying the bills and getting your pension after decades of labor.

You want to make sense of your purpose on this planet and feel like what you do is somehow important.

Then, I urge you to read and reflect on “The work we were born to do” by Nick Williams.

Here are my favorite quotes to inspire you:

“We are encouraged to think about how we will find a job and make employers say yes to us in a world where we believe there aren’t enough jobs and we’ll have to compete. So we marginalize our creativity, our spirit and joy.”

“I would like to reinvent the idea of a proper job: it has many strands, a portfolio; its hours suit our lifestyle; it allows us to find and utilize the best and most creative parts of us; it incorporates and accommodates us as a whole person; it affords the opportunity to grow, expand and discover more about ourselves; it is based on win/win and co-operation; it allows us to expand into being a whole human being – mind, body, emotions and spirit. That is proper work!”

“Our belief that we have to work can be very deep, even to the extent that we may not know what to do with our lives if we don’t work.”

“If you are called to be a street sweeper, sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted, or Beethoven composed music or Shakespeare wrote poetry. Sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will pause to say, ‘Here lived a great sweeper who did his job well.’” Martin Luther King Jr.

“The key to the work we were born to do is that we can change our attitude, our state of mind, our motivation, even the consciousness with which we work. We can make the transition from working with resentment, boredom or dissatisfaction to gratitude, pleasure and happiness. In doing so we can see our existing work differently and even begin to transform it, see new possibilities and begin to enjoy it in much greater ways. Changing our attitude may or may not ultimately involve us in actually changing our job.”

“Every decision is a choice between love and fear.” A course in Miracles

“Intuition is the language of the soul speaking through the heart. (…) Intuition, rather than logic, is often the way we break out of old struggles, mindsets and limitations. (…) When we follow our intuitions, we rarely see the complete picture, but are shown how to take each step one at a time.”

“To be nobody but yourself in - a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else – means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.” e e cummings

“It is not the change that is painful, but it is often our resistance to change, our attachment to old ways, beliefs and concepts that causes our pain. Sometimes a letting go of an old way of being can feel like a death, but when we persevere, the rebirth always follows”.

“’Who the heck do you think you are anyway? Who are you to think you have anything of value or use to say, write or share? It’s all been done before, so why bother?’ We can often use our cleverness and intellect to fuel our doubts. The most enlightened approach is simply to smile at them and know that they are tests to see if we take them seriously or not.”

“A traveler came to a work site and saw two men carrying large blocks of stone, one looking bored and frustrated, the other looking happy and fulfilled. He asked the first one, ‘What are you doing?’, and his response was, ‘Moving stones.’ When he asked the other one the same question, he responded, ‘Building a cathedral.’”


Please share your stories with us! 
How were you sure about the work you do? 
Have you read a good book and would like to recommend it?
Leave a comment below.

Since I read Pollyanna when I was a teenager and thought her glad game was awesome and I should definitely try and play it, I have been drawn to the concept of gratitude as a tool and mindset that makes my life happier.

Whenever I’m feeling down, I turn to gratitude. 

I list (mentally or on a sheet of paper) everything that I am grateful for in my life or in that particular moment. It’s more than just seeing the bright side of everything, it’s a deep understanding that you have more to be happy about than your worries and obsessions try to hide.

Last week I was reading The work we were born to do, by Nick Williams (it’s an awesome book and I’ll come back to talk about it) and he hit the spot again.

If you don’t have the habit of making a gratitude list and don’t know where to start, reflect on this: 

I personally like to sit quiet, close my eyes and think about my family, my love, all the places I’ve been, people I’ve met, all the work I’ve done, the value I added to people’s lives and vice-versa, the comfortable bed and roof over my head, the yummy food I just had or will have, my health, my skills, nature and peace around me, my strength and courage and so it goes… It grounds me back to self-confidence and love, peace of mind and inspiration. It makes me stop feeling sorry for myself or obsessed that things aren’t working the way they should. 

How about you? Do you have a gratitude practice? Are you going to try it today?

Becoming a parent changed everything for me. Everything. It is without a doubt, the best and hardest work I've ever done, especially because I want so badly to do it well.  I’m sure most parents would agree. 

There was a time in the not-so-distant past, when I thought my job as a parent was to try to figure out how to be a perfect mum. I would stay up all night researching on the internet, reading parenting books and agonizing about what I should be doing. I don’t recommend this as a parenting strategy, by the way, instead of perfect I mostly just ended up being tired, resentful and overwhelmed. So I decided it was time to stop working so hard and to start doing the hard work.

I love the quote, “how you do one thing is how you do everything” and I’m sometimes a bit sad that I didn’t learn it earlier on in my life. Or, maybe it was there all along and I just couldn’t see it until I became a parent. Either way, when I’d finally had enough and really stopped to think about it, I realized that I was doing parenting the same way I had done school and work and everything else in my life. Yikes! I’ve had many breakdowns and breakthroughs and thankfully, trying to be better than perfect is not how I do things anymore.

Now I practice what I like to call living on purpose and parenting on purpose. This is the opposite of letting life happen to me, or just doing what everyone else does without question, like I was doing before.

When decisions need to be made or questions come up for me, I sit down, take a breath and ask myself:

     1.    What are my priorities?

     What am I trying to do/be/accomplish for myself, for my kids and in this situation?

     2.    Is this what I/we really need right now?

     Does it fit with my priorities? Will it make things easier or harder for us? Where do I see this going in the        future and is that where I want to be? Do I even need to make a decision about this?

     3.    What works for my family? For my little people?

     What are our routines? What do we love? How do my kids learn best? How can I support them/me              through confusing times and change?

These questions help me to get really clear about my thoughts, my feelings and my options. Then, I can choose how I react, how I spend my time and energy and I can say, “no, thank you” to the things and people that don’t fit with my priorities.

I don’t think there is such a thing as a perfect parent anymore and I’ve given up on perfection in other areas of my life too. Now, I think the best I can do is to pay attention, to know my kids really well and know myself really well. That is my purpose.

If you woke up tomorrow and were free to do anything you wanted with your life, what would you do and who would you be?

This question is very close to my heart. I have always felt I had the right to do whatever I wanted with my life and I refused to do what everyone else was doing.

I grew up in a small town and saw most people my age settling for any job, getting married, having children and working their asses off to keep up with the bills. In my early twenties, I wasn’t able to understand that.

I believed I was supposed to do more with my life - to find work that made me happy and energized me besides paying my bills; to see the world and meet people and be free (as opposite to stuck in my little town).

Today I see that we do the best with what it’s given to us, and I was given a free spirit and a dreamy heart, a supportive family and opportunities. I had to honour that. I have done a lot of what I dreamed and much more. Today I live an amazing life but I still have a vision of who I want to be and what I want to do.

I am not sure what kind of job or business I will be working on, but if I woke up tomorrow and could do and be anything I wanted, I would:

• Dedicate some time to write everyday;
• Spend quality time with my loved ones;
  
• Have quiet time to read a book and meditate;
• Cook and eat delicious food;
  
• Go for walks in nature;
• Have my own house with a garden, big backyard, vegetable patch, chicken and a kitty :)
• Live in a safe, peaceful, quiet and green area;
• Travel whenever I felt like;
  
• Be location independent and have an abundant + supportive job/business/service;
• Be engaged in my community;
• Be brave, self-confident, positive and kind.

What’s your definition of freedom in business and adventure in life?

I have never had a business, but I have provided services (private lessons and translating) and the way I see it, freedom in business is being able to work when and where you feel best and most inspired and energized. It’s also being able to work with people who add value to your life instead of just having to “put up” with them. Freedom in business means being creative, being yourself and making your wildest visions come to reality.

Adventure in life is all about having the courage to get out of your comfort zone, doing something that sounds scary and crazy at first, facing your fears and anxieties and having the time of your life meanwhile. It’s about listening to your intuition and being brave and knowing that beyond what’s “safe” something really amazing is waiting. 

Do you want to share your own answers to those questions? Do you have any advice or comment? Don't hesitate to leave a word in the box below.